Dear Martha: Don't Hate The Day of Love

A plea for possibility, hope, and love.

Dear Martha –

Why is it that every time I mention casually, that Valentine’s Day is around the corner I get an eye roll, a scoff, and a general bolt of negative energy from most everyone? (that’s not “everyone” but I would say it’s most of the people I know with the exception of a special few).  What’s up with hating love? I don’t at all get it.

Yes, yes, I’m aware that people think the holiday was created by Hallmark and other card companies to drive revenue….you know what, blah blah blah.

I love love, and I love the celebration of it, and I love getting a card from someone who loves me, and I love sending one to someone I love.  Why does engaging in Valentine’s Day make you a sell-out these days? It’s completely depressing.

Since you seem to love love too….can you help me to understand why we’re surrounded by a bunch of negative Nancy’s?


Hugs & Kisses –

A Lover At Heart, no matter what


Dear sweet Lover,

You are so so so right. What has this world come to? If we are at the point where we are now finding fault in Valentine’s Day, wow, do we have a lot of work to do.

It’s ironic because all those ‘downers’ who think it’s ‘in’ to defame the day of love….they get cards.  And I would have to put a load of money on the table to say that when they open that red/pink/purple envelope they don’t scoff, frown, or throw the card on the ground and walk away. They revel in the fact that someone loves them. Obviously. Who doesn’t love to be reminded of love?

Now a days it’s cool to roll your eyes at supposed ‘corporate-created holidays’ – I have two thoughts on this.  First, Hallmark did not create Valentine’s Day, it’s a card company, who can blame them for making cards to commemorate it and maybe even drive some business?  Since when do we hate business? Aren’t we all engaged in making money in some aspect or form? Yes, we are. Real people work at Hallmark and card companies, who have real families, real needs and wants like the rest of us. So get off the Hallmark thing all you downers.

Second, Valentine’s Day has been around for ages since approximately 500 AD, starting with the celebration of the life and work of Saint Valentine. Here’s a bit of trivia for you, it’s the second most widely celebrated holiday around the world behind New Years Day. 

For a world drowning in hate most of the time, it’s quite nice to think once a year ‘most of us’ are focusing on love, just a thought. It’s a holiday that's been evolving since it’s beginning.  And to all the haters out there, St. Valentine was initially imprisoned for illegally performing wedding ceremonies for soldiers who were forbidden to marry. During his time in jail it was said that he healed the daughter of his jailer and the day before his execution he left her a note titled “To My Valentine”. It’s origin therefore was not romantic love but love in its purest form, the caring for of humanity  and the celebration of selfless acts. Seems like an awfully legitimate man and concept to call out as a holiday. 

But you know most of the hate and negativity comes from broken hearts or those who have lost love, or have yet to experience real love. I guess we can’t blame them for their bleeding hearts and scars. Valentine’s Day, however, is for everyone, not just for lovers, as St. Valentine showed us.

At the end of the day, there really are two groups of ‘downers’, there are those that have a real reason to not love the 'Day of Love' and then there are those who are just desperately need to ‘look good’.

Those who are burdened by the need to ‘look good’ need love the most. Don’t let your joy for the holiday be tarnished by them. You’re upholding it as it was meant to be. I haven’t had love in years, but Valentine’s Day is by far my favorite. To me it’s more a day of reveling in the love that others have found and also a day to reinstate hope for the future.

Love will come to us all. Love is what makes the world go round. So to all those out there hurt by love or waiting for cupid’s arrow to strike their heart, I’d advise honoring the holiday that celebrates just that, what do you have to loose?

Happy Valentine’s Day to all – may this year be the one that swells your heart, that sees you walking on air, and that opens your world to possibility. 


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